Being alone together sounds like an oxymoron to me to the least, but it is sea deep. Being in a relationship and breaking up when things don’t fall in place is an altogether different game and pain. But, being married to each other, not being compatible, but still forced-to-live-together — unimaginably painful. This post is for one of my closest friend (who wouldn’t read this) and for those who are going through this emotional numbness.
The joy and happiness when we surf through candid photography pictures of a successful and lavish wedding are heartwarming indeed. But, are they really happy? If yes, for how many days? Most weddings are after the so-called-horoscope-match but. But.. do we know if they are a match – mentally, physically, emotionally? A big No to at least 7 out of 10 marriages.
None are signing up for this emotionally unavailable relationship at the start, but life has it’s own ways, right? There are times where people bend over backward to make it work – but-still-FAIL. I know of friends who are now professional fake lovers for the sake of their families. Every time I hear this, it aches. How long would one hide their true selves? Won’t their masks fall off? I would wonder. How many days one would stay so chained-up. It pains to think!
They get married with an expectation of finding an anchor for life, but turn a heavy backpack that hangs on each other’s shoulder affecting them forever. I’ve been with them, I’ve tried to mend things between them, but, certain things can never be straightened back to normal.
Two hearts get shattered in a crowded room but none around would ever hear, Can you imagine the pain? Won’t those pair of eyes look at each other with love, at all? Won’t they become one in each other’s arm? Never. I hear. Because they tried it all. They are doped up on this worrisome that they are comfortable living in this ‘alone-together’ relationship that they don’t even think of the What-it’d-be-like-to-leave? Family pressure, caste issues, society problems, alimony, life after this, etc.., etc.. puts them together again in that fucked-up-box.
What use of being wealthy? When all you do is to cry, and add salt to your chocolate chip ice cream? Of broken dreams and nightmares – living this butchered life forever, and being the victim of this, naming it FATE. From the never-ending flow of tears to muffled tears, from shout-out-loud to calm demeanor, from spitting foul words to emptied words – the transition to this emptiness. Appalling!
“How long will you two act like this? What are we having a rehearsal dinner? – It’s life, you freaking meatballs,” I yelled at them. “We are better off but still we opt to stay under the same roof,” they said. The coppery sensation I felt when they spoke to me lingers yet. It is piercing my soul to see you two doing this to each other. I don’t want you two to stay in this such abusively-tucked-in relationship.
Enough being so distant, and locked away from each other. Can you both stand as two naked souls and talk to each other leaving your ego suits away? Would I ever see you both happier? I just hope some light edges around. I’ve done enough, but I would still continue, even after all these fruitless efforts, I will still worry my head to find a way out of this for you two.
If any of you are living ‘alone-together’, please take the initiative to solve it by-any-mean. To understand the imperfection of each other, to appreciate the differences and to enjoy the sweet-nothings is tougher than rocket science. End of the day, we’ll never know what’s going in the other’s mind, but, why don’t we just try? Will you?